Thinking kindly: A reply to the This Is My Story podcast
‘This is my story’ is an occasional series of short devotions, based around the Bible, the experiences of Open Table members, reflection and prayer.
Last month OTN Director Kieran Bohan shared a reflection on news reports of his civil partnership - the first to be registered in a place of worship in the UK. This response is by Moon - you can read their story of finding God at Pride here.
Although, I no longer identify as a Christian, I have friends who are and some of the kindest people I have met are Christians. Some of them belong to Open Table, which is where I met Kieran Bohan. I also receive the Open Table emails which is where I found out about this blog post by him. In it, he puts three questions for reflection. So here are my responses:
When have you experienced judgment or hatred because of who you are, who you love, or what you believe?
“Kindness is the antidote to judgment and hatred. Kindness is respectful and inclusive and builds community.”
There’s too many to mention them all. But let's just say the source of most of it my entire life, is all the bullsh*t the media like to produce. The debating of my identity and sexuality, for example, as though a contrary opinion is going to make me go, ‘You know what. You're right! All those decades I spent since I was a toddler wrestling with doubt and self-hatred was a complete waste of my time! I should just have listened to you. Thank you for sharing your opinion that is almost identical to the billions of others I've encountered and heaven knows why I ignored them all because now I see the light!’ They know their argument doesn’t convince people to change. So they turn to bans instead. They go from inclusion (on their terms) to exclusion. It’s all about gatekeeping.
What brought you consolation during that time?
Kindness. Kindness is the antidote to judgment and hatred. Kindness is respectful and inclusive and builds community. Being human, we fail often - especially when encouraged and rewarded to be otherwise - but we're all capable of it. We just need to remind ourselves to choose kindness always.
How did you experience Jesus, or Spirit, or God as you understand God, during that time?
Well, in my lifetime, Jesus/Spirit/God has been experienced and understood as both my persecutor and my saviour. Beliefs, after all, are what you believe and I’ve never been constant in what I believe. About anything. I see the world and universe(s) as infinitely nuanced. I'm only as good as what I know. I can only grow through increasing my knowledge. Look at the harm a closed mind does. I don't want to be like that: destructive. If nothing else, I'm a creative. So let me think of it another way…
How did you experience kindness during that time?
When I was made welcome. Thankfully, as much as the UK feels unkind, I can still find welcome. That may be Open Table and the Greenbelt festival (I wrote about my first experience here), but it may also be Liverpool’s Unity Theatre and Eat Me monthly drag cabaret. It might also be a walk in the woods, or playing football in a field, or any one of a number of things. But, in the instance of Kieran’s blog, it's in being reminded you're not the only one to have faced hard times; it's in knowing you're not alone.
And now, like Kieran, I shall end with a prayer…
Let us strive for kindness
Let us strive for enlightenment
Let us strive for community
Let us strive for creativity
And let us shun their opposites.
