‘This is my story’ is an occasional series of short devotions, based around the Bible, the experiences of Open Table members, reflection and prayer.

This month, Sarah Jones wonders how we can honour who God has created us to be.

Reading

I often think of the heavens
your hands have made,
and of the moon and stars
you put in place.
Then I ask, “Why do you care
about us humans?
Why are you concerned
for us weaklings?”

- Psalm 8:3-4 (CEV)

Reflection

This was the first Bible passage I learnt by heart. I was eight years old, and I’d been given these verses to read in a school assembly: a little slip of paper with some words to go home and memorise. It was the first time I can recall an experience of God speaking directly to me through scripture. I kept that scrap of paper for years, like the precious gift it was.

These two short verses have come back to me frequently throughout my life. Every time these verses come to mind, God has a new realisation for me.

I was 29 when I realised that I was bisexual. I had grown up in a conservative evangelical Anglican family. We were white, middle class and very traditional. I wasn’t even allowed to watch ITV!

Although it was acknowledged that some people lived outside of our heteronormative Christian world, I was brought up to understand that this was not God’s ideal. These were people we should pray for. Being bisexual was perhaps considered even worse - it meant I was being ‘wilfully sinful’.

Despite all this, I’ve never felt any conflict between my personal faith and my orientation. In fact, I was blessed with the opposite. It was in understanding my sexual orientation that I had the most powerful realisation of God and God’s creation in me. Denying how I was created to love meant denying the loving power and purpose of God’s creation; denying the moon and stars of their place to shine.

Yet even more significant than a heavenly affirmation was the profound deepening of my understanding and love for God. It was a pivotal point in my journey of faith.

These two verses tell me so much: God created me, God has a place and a purpose for me, God cares for me. Though I am a ‘weakling’, this certain knowledge is my inner strength and it sustains me.

Reflect for a moment:

• Who has God created you to be? And how can you honour that?

• God set the moon and stars in their places. Where have you been placed to shine?

Prayer

Heavenly Creator,
how majestic are your works.
Forgive us when we forget ourselves.
Forgive us when we try to meet
the world’s definition of your ideal
instead of looking to you.
You have crowned us
with glory and honour.
May we honour you
by celebrating your creation in us.
Protect those who, like Jesus,
are persecuted
for shining their light in the darkness.
May their strength be a beacon of hope,
sharing your love with all humanity.
Amen

Author

Sarah Jones (she/her) first found belonging with Open Table Liverpool in 2010. She has worked in the charity sector for more than 20 years and supported the process of the Open Table Network [OTN] becoming a charity in 2021. Sarah now works to connect OTN with funding opportunities. When she's not helping people to run charities, she helps people to run marathons (as well as running a few herself).